Night Music: You Don’t Own Me

October 10, 2016

Poem: Creme Brulee

October 10, 2016


To make a crème brulee

take a luscious creamy custard

and a butane torch

and burn the bugger to bits


cocaine and speed were her butane

her body and brain the custard.

That was her life she was burning

though she thought they were just desserts


Kim Jong-Trump

October 10, 2016

I have heard it said that Donald Trump is cozy with the Russians; that he is Russia’s candidate. But I think analysts are missing the mark. Donald Trump is, in fact, the candidate of North Korea.


This is confirmed by a verbal tic that was prominent in last night’s debate. Trump said he was “the greatest expert” on the tax code that has ever run for President; that “no-one has more respect for women” than him;  that he has “a very, very great balance sheet, so great”. In earlier speeches and comments he has said “no-one builds better walls than me”, “my fingers are long and beautiful”, “my women are the most beautiful”, “my IQ is one of the highest”, and many other grandiloquent statements.

These are all clearly taken from the handbook of the Dear Leader who once scored 11 holes-in-one on a single round of golf, who wrote 1,500 books in the three years he was at university, was the greatest architect, the greatest scriptwriter and songwriter, and, of course, wrote the greatest poem ever written.

No doubt about it: Donald Trump is the Pyongyang Candidate.